


I Can't Explain

by AndreaLovesMichonne



Category: CSI: Crime Scene Investigation
Genre: Angst, F/F, POV First Person, Unrequited Love
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-08-31
Updated: 2013-08-31
Packaged: 2017-12-25 05:26:12
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 318
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/949125
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AndreaLovesMichonne/pseuds/AndreaLovesMichonne
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>I'm not quite sure when it happen, let alone how it happened.</p>
            </blockquote>





	I Can't Explain

I'm not quite sure when it happen, let alone how it happened. 

It just did. 

But when the hell did it get this complicated? 

When the hell did I allow it to get this complicated? 

How could I not have seen this coming? 

Was I really that naïve? 

It wasn't supposed to be like this-far from it. 

We just got caught up in a moment of lust. 

There was never any physical attraction to begin with. Sure, I thought Catherine was attractive-bitchy, but attractive-but it never meant I wanted to sleep with the woman!

I can't recall who made the first move, but before I knew it we were in a bathroom stall, fucking. 

The following day we acted as if nothing happened. However, it would only be a matter of time before our urges and desires took hold. 

In the work environment we were colleagues, but outside of work…we were fuck buddies. 

It couldn't have been simpler. 

Lust was lust and fucking, was, well…fucking. 

It was what we wanted, right? 

Wrong. 

In the beginning it may have been what we wanted, but somehow, as days turned into weeks and weeks turned into months, I found myself falling for her. Which was ridiculous, considering the circumstances. 

I wanted a relationship. It wasn't about lust or sex, not anymore. But, unfortunately, as far as Catherine was concerned, I was her fuck buddy and nothing more. 

And that was all I would ever be. 

I should have walked away as soon as I realized, but I couldn't, and now I'm in too deep with no chance of escaping. 

But, truth be told, if this was the only way I could have some sort of relationship with Catherine, even if it was just her 'fuck buddy,' then so be it. Degrading as it was, I would rather have some form of physical contact with Catherine than none at all.

**Author's Note:**

> Originally written in '07 for lj's csi50 theme: combo # 041-lust and fivebyfiction set: #5, prompt: when?  
> Beta: Thanks to iamtheenemy for the wonderful betaing and recommended changes.


End file.
